bridalexpert

Shut Up!

In Uncategorized on December 16, 2008 at 9:21 pm

One of my biggest pet peeves are when customers don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.  Case in point: I’ve been working with this bride for the past month.  She’s been in our store at least half a dozen times to show her friends and family the dress that she was going to purchase.  She had narrowed it down between two and did the same little test that she did for everyone.  She would put them both on, ask her friends and family to tell her which one they liked better, and then ask them why they liked it better.  She already knew which one she loved more, but it was obvious that she wanted everyone to agree with her too. Even a stranger off the street could tell which dress she liked better just by looking at the expression on her face.  One by one, each person told her that they loved the second dress on her, solidifying her choice even more.

Until the aunt arrived.  Now, the aunt wasn’t alone.  She was with the mom, the bride’s sister’s, and the maid of honor.  Obviously, this was decision day for the bride.

So the bride started her routine, not telling her family which dress she was going to put on first.  So she came out with Dress #1 and showed her relatives, who all commented appropriately on how she looked.  She went back to the fitting room, where I helped her with THE dress.  We fixed her hair, put in a veil and tiara, and took about 10 minutes longer to come out of the room than with the first dress. Hint, hint.

So we all walked out of the room, the bride with a huge smile on her face, and looked expectedly at her family, waiting to hear their responses.

Gasp! “Oh my God.” Her mom put her hands to her mouth in prayer-type fashion.

“It’s beautiful! You look amazing!” Her maid of honor.

One by one, sisters clamored over the bride, interrupting each other with more comments about how wonderful their sister looked, touching the dress, examining her train, her veil, and talking about all the pictures the bride would have to take on her wedding day.

Everyone was in agreement with the bride. Everyone except the aunt.

“Auntie, what do you think?”

The aunt, with a fake smile plastered on her face, said “You look very pretty.”

…..

“But I don’t know.” Uh-oh.  I knew what was coming right away. And the look on my bride’s face was indescribable.  To this day, I’ve never seen a smile fall so fast into a look of shock, annoyance, and hopelessness.  The aunt seemed oblivious.

“It just seems like to much lace for my taste. I don’t think it’s the right dress for you.” She continued with her “I don’t like this and I don’t like that” pointing to different areas of the dress, while the bride just stood there dazed.

YOU IDIOT! I thought. That’s one of the worst things you could ever say to a bride.  I wanted to bind the aunt’s mouth with the train that I was holding. “How do you like the lace now?” But this was no time to fantasize.

I desperately looked at the rest of the family, hoping that they would say something to the aunt that I couldn’t say in my position. The bride’s mother was glaring at her own sister with pure hatred.  The sisters had become quiet and the maid of honor was looking sympathetically at the bride. No help from them.

“Well I think you look absolutely stunning.  It’s obvious that this is the dress you’ve pictured yourself getting married in.” I said. “And that’s all that matters.” I firmly added, looking directly at her. She nodded.

The sisters chimed in right on cue. “Yeah, you look great, sis!” “Jeremy’s going to be speechless when he sees you!” The mom at this point was whispering heatedly to the aunt, who was looking very apologetic now.  Yeah, I thought, rip her a new one!

The bride bought her favorite dress that day, but with a little less excitement than she had planned on.

So my word of advice: Know when to keep you mouth shut, ladies.  In the end, it’s not your opinion that should determine what the bride is going to wear on her wedding day.  At least, it shouldn’t be. In my case, my bride happened to pick two dresses where both of them would have looked beautiful on her wedding day. And in truth, there were many similarities between them.  So for the aunt to pick apart the gown just to have her own words heard is nothing short of a person who doesn’t use her brain very often. Sure, you can give your opinions, and in the case where a dress really looks hideous on your bride, it may be very tempting to say something.  But LOOK at the bride first.  Read her expressions. Does she really want your opinion, or does she want you to agree with her? Is she beaming in a dress that YOU would never be caught wearing? If so, then keep your f**king mouth shut!

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